And at his check up we learned that Big Fat Baby is neither Big nor Fat. I don’t know if it’s the presence of all those extra baby chins that conveniently make up for the lack of a baby neck but the boy really does look like a sweet little chubbins… alas, he is not. I really do hate to disappoint my family members who scoffed when I told them he probably weighed between eleven and twelve pounds, guessing he came in somewhere around 13.

Here’s how he measures up:

Weight: 10 lb 11 oz {13.45%}

Height: 22 inches {11.13%}

Head: 15.24 cm {36.39%}

Not only is Ezra not a big baby in general, he isn’t even my biggest baby. That award goes to Keaton who at two months was a full pound heavier. The important thing is that even though he actually is pretty small, he is following a healthy growth curve and is fairly proportional, so yay UnFat Baby!

Here’s what’s happening at two months…

Sleep is going mostly okay. Really it’s about as good as you are going to get out of a two month old if you don’t include those random asshole babies that sleep 10 hours a night at 8 weeks. Those mythical babies seem to come out of the woodwork when you are asked to describe your child’s sleep habits at this age, but notice the children they speak of are either now well past infanthood or the baby being described is in fact their husband’s cousin’s nephew’s son, thrice removed. In any case, I don’t think those babies actually exist and even if they did I wince at the thought of how uncomfortable the night would be on the old hooters at this point and what a pain in the ass it would be to have to get up to pump twice in the night.

As it is, right now I feed Ezra between 7:30-8:30, then Bill swaddles him tight and lays him down. With all the hubbub of the holidays, we’ve been up super late so we typically wake him up between 11:30 to midnight to feed and change him before we tuck in. Based on the few times we’ve let him be, he’d probably go to 12:30-1am but I hate having to get up within an hour of going to sleep so we’ll see where the cards fall once Bill and I are back to a respectable bedtime after the new year.

The next feeding has sort of been a crapshoot, he’ll go anywhere from 3.5 to 5 hours, it’s just kind of tricky to tell when to get him up because he rarely actually cries, instead he sort of half wakes up and grunts but his eyes are closed and we can’t tell if we should wake him to feed him or endure baby grunts for an hour or so before we finally give up and feed him. And even when we do, much of the time he sleeps very fitfully for that last stretch between 4-7am. I think we’ll have to better address this once we’re back to some semblance of a routine which we did attempt the week before Christmas but abandoned due to the two month sleep regression {which seems to have come and gone fairly quickly} and the crazy holiday schedule.

As for naps, I am just taking my cues from the baby at this point. Ezra has a very distinct “tired cry” which is really just a sort of mewling coo that if I catch at the right time, will allow for an easy rock and lay down that can garner anywhere from 35 minutes to a two hour nap, and we never can tell which way it will go, but the average is around an hour and fifteen minutes a pop if we’re lucky. If I miss the window however, he can be a pain in the ass to get to sleep and even when I do he doesn’t stay down when he’s over-tired. How many naps he gets are tricky because they’re based off of our routine which is different almost every day of the week because of the kids’ school and dance schedules. Mondays and Tuesdays Keaton is home all day, and we have to pick Rowan up from school at roughly the same time to get her to dance. Wednesdays Keaton has preschool and lunch bunch, then a break, then dance, and Rowan has nothing. Thursdays and Fridays Keaton has preschool and things have been all over the place as far as when and who has dance, if at all, so we really are just taking it day by day. After the break we’ll be resuming a full schedule so it’ll be nuts, but a predictable kind of nuts, so there’s that.

As for milestones, we decided to move Ezra to his crib, which rested a whole 6 inches from the bassinet, so not a huge move I grant you, but a bittersweet one nonetheless. I would have normally kept him in the bassinet until he was 3-4 months but he kept squirming and he’d wake up with his face pressed up against the side and I know it was probably fine, the kid already has great head control, but it made me nervous. Since the crib is really right there it just made sense for him to use it, which is completely foreign for us at this age because Rowan slept in the bassinet until she was almost 5 months and Keaton would act like we were pulling his limbs off if we even walked toward the crib with him~ he didn’t touch the thing until he was almost eight months old.

Ezra still eats every 2-3.5 hours during the day, sometimes 4 if we’re running around in the evenings. He usually eats more in the morning and early afternoon, then goes for longer stretches in the evening. He still is having trouble with reflux. Unfortunately the stint at the chiropractor did not produce the magic fix we were looking for. Our options at this point are to put him on medicine or try to further prop his crib up or for me to cut out dairy to see if it helps the spitting up and the grunting. Our ped is not really concerned because it doesn’t seem to be causing an overly fussy baby and it clearly isn’t inhibiting his growth. I might try the dairy thing but it’s a tricky call… on the one hand, I want to make Ezra as comfortable as possible, on the other hand, FANCY CHEESE. It’s a lot tougher call than it probably should be, Internet.

The biggest change this month was definitely in his level of alertness. Starting at four weeks he’d give us a cautious smile, but around 6 weeks he threw caution to the wind and throws those suckers around like nobody’s business. He went from laying on his back and kicking for maybe 5 minutes a pop at one month, to kicking and smiling, cooing and gurgling on his playmat for up to an hour if we let him {which I mostly don’t because it’s almost impossible to not pick up and snuggle a baby who is being that ridiculously adorable}. Bill and I marvel at how similar he looks to the other two at this age, vacillating from looking like his brother to his sister and back again in one hour’s time. Sometime it’s a feature, sometime an expression, but one thing’s for sure, we make consistent looking kids.

I can’t believe two months has already gone by with you in our lives, Mini Sir. It seems I waited impossibly long to hold you in my arms and now you’re already squirming and kicking and making the first attempts at independence. It simultaneously breaks my heart open and fills it up to the bursting point and god when I hold you to my chest right before you fall asleep, stroking your forehead and watching you give in and let sleep take over your sweet face… if heaven or something like it exists on some plane of the universe, well, that moment, that place with you, would be mine.